Femi gave his life to Christ at a youth camp when he was sixteen. The man who preached that night became his spiritual father. For the next twelve years Femi followed his ministry closely. He bought every message on CD, then every download. He quoted him in conversations. When a question about the Bible came up, his first instinct was to ask, “What did Pastor say about this?” His faith, his vocabulary and even his prayers carried the accent of this one man.
Then one Monday morning the story was everywhere. The newspapers, the blogs, the WhatsApp groups. The allegations were serious, and over the following weeks they were largely confirmed. Femi was devastated. He stopped going to church. He stopped reading his Bible. When a friend visited him months later and asked how he was doing with God, Femi said something that has stayed with me. “I am not sure I ever knew God,” he said. “I think I knew Pastor.”
So let me put a question to you, and I ask it gently. If the person who first taught you about Jesus disappointed you tomorrow, what would happen to your confidence in Christ?
The question may feel uncomfortable. Most of us first came to the Scriptures through someone we trusted. A parent prayed with us. A pastor explained salvation. A friend invited us to a meeting. Their contribution was real, and gratitude is right and proper. Yet their faithfulness cannot become the foundation on which the identity of Jesus rests in our hearts. Their task was to bring us to Him. Ours is to know Him.
“Now mine eye seeth thee”
At the end of the book of Job, after all his suffering, after all the arguments with his friends, after God Himself had spoken out of the whirlwind, Job said something extraordinary:
I have heard of thee by the hearing of the ear: but now mine eye seeth thee. Wherefore I abhor myself , and repent in dust and ashes.
Job had been a godly man from the first verse of the book. He feared God and turned away from evil. He offered sacrifices for his children. He knew a great deal about God. But at the end of his trial he could say, “I have heard of thee by the hearing of the ear: but now mine eye seeth thee.” Something had moved from hearsay to encounter. What he had received second-hand had become first-hand.
That journey is what this teaching is about. Knowing Jesus for yourself means coming to trust Him on the basis of who He is and what He has done, and growing in real fellowship with Him through His Word and His Spirit. It does not mean withdrawing from teachers, or claiming that your private impressions are beyond correction. The Christ we come to know personally is the Christ witnessed to in Scripture and confessed by His people down the centuries. But He must become your Christ, and not only your pastor’s.
From someone else’s testimony to your own
John 4 gives us one of the clearest pictures of this movement in the whole Bible. A Samaritan woman met Jesus at a well at noon. He told her everything she had ever done, and she ran back into her town telling everyone, “Come, see a man.” Then watch what happens:
And many of the Samaritans of that city believed on him for the saying of the woman, which testified, He told me all that ever I did. So when the Samaritans were come unto him, they besought him that he would tarry with them: and he abode there two days. And many more believed because of his own word; And said unto the woman, Now we believe, not because of thy saying: for we have heard him ourselves, and know that this is indeed the Christ, the Saviour of the world.
Many believed because of what she said. That is how most of us started. Someone told us. Then Jesus stayed with them two days, and many more believed because of His own word. And at the end they said to the woman, “Now we believe, not because of thy saying: for we have heard him ourselves, and know that this is indeed the Christ, the Saviour of the world.”
Her testimony was not wasted. It had done exactly what a testimony is supposed to do: it brought them to Jesus. Then He took it from there.
A faithful minister should long for this movement in the people he serves. We are not trying to make people permanently dependent on our spiritual confidence. We teach and explain the Scriptures so that people can recognise the voice and character of Christ for themselves. Paul says that God gave apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors and teachers “for the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ: Till we all come in the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, unto a perfect man” (Ephesians 4:12-13). The goal of every ministry gift is maturity in the knowledge of the Son of God. A ministry that produces lifelong spiritual dependants has missed the point.
Borrowed conviction is fragile. You can usually recognise it when someone can defend a favourite preacher passionately but cannot explain the truth being taught. Ask a simple question about a passage and the only answer is, “That is what my pastor said.” The pastor may well have taught accurately. But the learner still needs to understand why the teaching is sound, so that it can stand when the pastor is not standing beside them.
The Bereans are the model here. When Paul came to Berea, “they received the word with all readiness of mind, and searched the scriptures daily, whether those things were so” (Acts 17:11). Luke calls them more noble for it. Notice the two halves. They received the word eagerly. They were not cynical or suspicious. And they searched the Scriptures daily to test it. Openness and examination belong together. We honour a good teacher by becoming attentive students, never by suspending our own responsibility to understand.
PunchlineA testimony has done its work when it brings you to Jesus. After that, He wants you to hear Him for yourself.
Knowing facts and knowing the Person
Some people respond to this subject by setting doctrine against relationship. “I do not need theology,” they say. “I just need Jesus.” That sounds spiritual, but it creates a false choice. Jesus Himself defined eternal life in terms of knowledge: “And this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent” (John 17:3). That knowledge has real content. It includes who the Father is, who the Son is, and the saving mission He fulfilled. Fellowship with an imagined Jesus, shaped by our own preferences, is no substitute for knowing the One the Father actually sent.
At the same time, accurate vocabulary does not automatically produce a yielded heart. A person may explain forgiveness perfectly and still refuse to bring his own guilt to Christ. Another may call Jesus Lord while carefully reserving one part of life where His authority is not welcome. Knowing Jesus involves receiving His testimony and responding to Him in trust and obedience.
Peter’s story shows both sides in a single chapter. Jesus asked His disciples who people said He was, and then He turned the question on them:
He saith unto them, But whom say ye that I am? And Simon Peter answered and said, Thou art the Christ, the Son of the living God. And Jesus answered and said unto him, Blessed art thou, Simon Bar-jona: for flesh and blood hath not revealed it unto thee, but my Father which is in heaven.
Peter got it right. And Jesus told him that this insight had not come from human reasoning; the Father had revealed it to him. That is a real encounter with the truth. Yet a few verses later, when Jesus began to speak about going to Jerusalem to suffer and die, the same Peter took Him aside and rebuked Him. Jesus’ reply was sharp: “Get thee behind me, Satan: thou art an offence unto me” (Matthew 16:23).
In the space of a few verses, Peter went from receiving revelation from the Father to speaking for the enemy. He knew something true about Jesus and still misunderstood what it meant for Jesus to be the Messiah. His genuine recognition needed further formation.
That should make us both confident and teachable. We do not need to doubt the relationship we have with Christ just because our understanding is incomplete. And we must never use an earlier spiritual experience as an excuse to stop learning. Christ can correct our expectations without ceasing to be the Christ we have believed. That is precisely what He did with Peter.
Thomas gives us another picture. He was not in the room when the risen Jesus first appeared to the disciples, and when they told him, he refused to accept their word. “Except I shall see in his hands the print of the nails,” he said, “I will not believe.” We often call him Doubting Thomas, but notice what he was really saying: I will not live on your experience. I need my own.
Eight days later Jesus came again and went straight to Thomas. He did not scold him for wanting to know for himself. He offered His hands and His side. And Thomas made the most personal confession in the Gospels: “My Lord and my God” (John 20:28). Not the Lord. My Lord. Jesus then added a blessing for all of us who would come later: “blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed” (John 20:29). We will not touch the nail prints as Thomas did. But we can come to the same personal confession, through the witness of Scripture and the work of the Spirit, and it is no less real for that.
Meet Him in the witness of Scripture
On the evening of the first Easter Sunday, two disappointed disciples were walking home to a village called Emmaus. Their hopes had been crushed by the crucifixion. A stranger joined them on the road and asked what they were discussing. They poured out their sorrow, and then the stranger began to speak:
Then he said unto them, O fools, and slow of heart to believe all that the prophets have spoken: Ought not Christ to have suffered these things, and to enter into his glory? And beginning at Moses and all the prophets, he expounded unto them in all the scriptures the things concerning himself.
It was the risen Jesus, though they did not yet recognise Him. And what did He do? He did not perform a miracle to convince them. He opened the Scriptures. Beginning at Moses and all the prophets, He explained the things concerning Himself. Later, after He had vanished from their sight, they said to each other, “Did not our heart burn within us, while he talked with us by the way, and while he opened to us the scriptures?” (Luke 24:32).
NuggetTheir understanding had to be reshaped by the story of Scripture, rather than by the expectations they had brought to it. They had wanted a Messiah who would avoid suffering. The Scriptures showed them a Messiah who would suffer and then enter His glory.
So read the Gospels with that same willingness to be corrected. Notice what Jesus actually says, whom He is speaking to and what question He is answering. Watch His compassion toward the poor and the outcast, His fearless exposure of religious hypocrisy and His unwavering commitment to the Father’s will. Follow the story as it moves toward the cross and the empty tomb. Individual sayings become much clearer when you see them within the identity and mission of the One who speaks them.
Then read the apostolic letters as Christ’s own explanation, through His apostles, of what His work means for the church. In 2 Corinthians 5:14-21, for example, Paul connects Christ’s death and resurrection with a whole new way of living, a new creation, and the ministry of reconciliation. We need both the Gospel narratives and the apostolic teaching. They belong to the one witness of the New Testament.
A simple practice helps a great deal. Choose a manageable passage from the Gospel of John. Read it more than once. Ask three questions. What does this reveal about Jesus? What do the people in the passage understand or misunderstand? How should I respond? Then write down any question you cannot yet answer, and take it to a reliable teacher rather than inventing an explanation.
One word of caution. Do not turn every detail of Scripture into a personal code. A number, the name of a town or a passing phrase is not automatically a secret instruction about your future. Scripture forms us as we understand what it actually communicates. Personal application should grow out of that meaning, never replace it.
Fellowship when no one is watching
A living relationship has room for honest speech and attentive listening. Prayer is where we express our dependence on the Father through Christ. You can thank Him, confess sin, ask for help and bring your confusion without dressing it up in religious language. The writer to the Hebrews invites us to come boldly to the throne of grace because we have a High Priest who is touched with the feeling of our infirmities (Hebrews 4:14-16). He understands. He has been where you are.
Jesus describes this ongoing relationship with the picture of a vine:
Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye, except ye abide in me. I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing.
Abide in Me. The branch does not produce fruit by straining. It produces fruit by remaining connected to the vine and receiving its life. Jesus connects abiding with His words remaining in us and with obedience that flows from His love (John 15:7-10). Abiding should not be reduced to maintaining a particular emotion all day long. It is an ongoing relationship of dependence and responsive obedience.
Some days the Scriptures will feel wonderfully fresh. Other days you will read with a tired mind and very little emotion. Keep going. A relationship is not measured only by its most intense moments. Married couples know this. The candlelit dinner matters, but so does the ordinary Tuesday morning cup of tea. Faithfulness in the ordinary hours allows truth to take root far beyond the atmosphere of a meeting.
The Holy Spirit is central to all of this. Jesus told His disciples that the Spirit of truth would guide them into all truth, and that “He shall glorify me: for he shall receive of mine, and shall shew it unto you” (John 16:14). That promise was given first to the apostles, through whom we received the New Testament. But in our own discipleship we depend on the same Spirit to illuminate what they wrote and to form the life of Christ in us. This gives us a simple test for any supposed leading: does it glorify Jesus? We should be very wary of anything that diminishes Him or contradicts His teaching.
John gives us a warning that every generation needs: “Beloved, believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God” (1 John 4:1). A strong inward impression does not become the voice of the Lord simply because it is strong. Examine it by Scripture, seek wise counsel, and watch its fruit over time. Humility is always safer than attaching God’s name to an untested preference.
Obedience reveals what we are learning
John’s first letter has a searching test for anyone who claims to know Christ: “And hereby we do know that we know him, if we keep his commandments” (1 John 2:3). A few verses later he adds that whoever says he abides in Him ought to walk as He walked.
John is not teaching that flawless conduct purchases a relationship with God. The same letter makes generous provision for honest confession and points us to Jesus Christ the righteous as our advocate with the Father (1 John 1:8-2:2). What John is exposing is a claim to know Christ that remains completely indifferent to His will. Knowing Him and ignoring Him do not sit comfortably together.
Let me give you an example. Kunle is a businessman who loves teachings about identity in Christ. He listens to them in his car every day. He can quote verses about righteousness and authority with real enthusiasm. Yet month after month, he delays paying his workers’ wages while spending freely on himself. His next step in knowing Jesus does not involve another hour of teaching. It involves a direct act of repentance: pay what he owes, acknowledge the wrong, and change the practice. James is blunt about this: “Behold, the hire of the labourers who have reaped down your fields, which is of you kept back by fraud, crieth” (James 5:4). Spiritual language cannot cover exploitation.
For another person, obedience may mean forgiving someone while also setting a necessary boundary. For someone else, it may mean finally telling the truth after years of hiding. The particular response differs from life to life, but the Lord has the right to address any area He chooses. We cannot reserve a private territory where His words have no authority.
Love for fellow believers is also a test. John refuses to separate professed love for God from how we treat the brother or sister in front of us: “for he that loveth not his brother whom he hath seen, how can he love God whom he hath not seen?” (1 John 4:20). A growing knowledge of Jesus should make you more truthful and more loving. It should never make you impossible to live with.
When a trusted leader disappoints you
Let me return to Femi, because his story is more common than many of us would like to admit.
A leader’s failure can cause deep pain, especially where spiritual trust has been misused. We should never respond by demanding that injured people minimise what happened. Truthful investigation, accountability and the protection of vulnerable people may all be necessary. Where abuse or crime is involved, appropriate safeguarding procedures and the civil authorities have a proper role. Covering up wrongdoing in the name of protecting the ministry is never faithfulness to Christ.
At the same time, a leader’s misconduct must not be allowed to redefine the character of Jesus. Paul addressed a church that was dividing into fan clubs around different ministers. “I am of Paul,” said some. “I am of Apollos,” said others. Paul’s response is still medicine for us:
Who then is Paul, and who is Apollos, but ministers by whom ye believed, even as the Lord gave to every man? I have planted, Apollos watered; but God gave the increase. So then neither is he that planteth any thing, neither he that watereth; but God that giveth the increase.
Ministers are servants. One plants, another waters, but God gives the increase. Then Paul adds, “For other foundation can no man lay than that is laid, which is Jesus Christ” (1 Corinthians 3:11). Servants can fail. The foundation remains Christ. That distinction does not excuse the servant’s failure. It simply places responsibility where it belongs, and keeps your faith resting where it should.
Femi’s journey back took time. A wise older couple in a different church invited him to their home for Sunday lunch, week after week, without pressuring him to attend services. They let him ask angry questions. They did not defend the fallen pastor, and they did not attack God either. One evening the husband handed Femi a Bible and said, “Read the Gospel of Mark this week. Not looking for answers to your questions. Just looking at Jesus.” Femi did. He said later that it was the first time in his life he had read a Gospel without a preacher’s voice in his head telling him what it meant. “I met Jesus,” he said simply. “The real one. And He was nothing like the man who hurt me.”
If you have been wounded, you may need time, wise pastoral care and a healthier church environment. Keep reading the Gospels with room for your questions. Find believers who will listen without defending wrongdoing. Receiving care from Christ’s people can be part of recovering confidence in Him. Knowing Jesus for yourself still grows within community, even when one particular community has hurt you. The writer to the Hebrews joins holding fast to our hope with “not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together” (Hebrews 10:25). The aim is mature fellowship under Christ, where teaching can be examined and people can be cared for truthfully.
Keep growing in the knowledge of Him
Listen to the testimony of the apostle Paul, written near the end of his life, after decades of ministry, miracles, revelations and churches planted across the Roman world:
But what things were gain to me, those I counted loss for Christ. Yea doubtless, and I count all things but loss for the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord: for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and do count them but dung, that I may win Christ, And be found in him, not having mine own righteousness, which is of the law, but that which is through the faith of Christ, the righteousness which is of God by faith: That I may know him, and the power of his resurrection, and the fellowship of his sufferings, being made conformable unto his death.
This is a mature apostle speaking. He has given up every reason for religious pride: his pedigree, his zeal, his law-keeping. He counts all of it as loss compared with “the excellency of the knowledge of Christ Jesus my Lord.” Notice the possessive: my Lord. And still, after all those years, his great ambition is “That I may know him.”
Paul never thought he had finished knowing Jesus. He wanted to know Him more, and he understood that this knowledge reaches into every part of life. It includes the power of His resurrection, and it includes the fellowship of His sufferings. Knowing Christ is not a relationship built only around comfort. Following Him may bring opposition and cost. But knowing Him gives strength to remain faithful when obedience is expensive, and the promise of resurrection keeps that cost inside a much larger hope.
So begin where you are. Open the Word. Ask honest questions. Respond to the truth you understand and stay willing to be corrected. Thank God for the people who introduced you to Jesus, the parent, the pastor, the friend, the preacher at youth camp. Then let their ministry achieve its proper purpose: a life increasingly established in Christ Himself.
PunchlineOne day, I pray, you will be able to say with Job, “I have heard of thee by the hearing of the ear: but now mine eye seeth thee.” And with the Samaritans: “Now we believe, not because of thy saying: for we have heard him ourselves.”
Teaching Companion
For Reflection
- Whose voice first introduced you to Jesus? What did their ministry give you, and what does it still need to lead you toward?
- If your favourite teacher were unavailable, could you explain from Scripture why you believe what you believe about Christ?
- Why does Peter’s experience in Matthew 16 make us both confident and teachable?
- Is there an area of your life where you have been enjoying teaching about Christ while resisting His word in practice?
This Week
Read the Gospel of Mark this week, about three chapters a day. Read it as though for the first time, looking only at Jesus: what He says, what He does, how He treats people. Keep a short list of anything that surprises you about Him. At the end of the week, write a paragraph beginning, “The Jesus I met in Mark is...”
A Prayer
Lord Jesus, I thank You for every person You used to bring me to You. Now I want to know You for myself. Open the Scriptures to me as You opened them on the road to Emmaus. Let my heart burn as You speak. Holy Spirit, take the things of Christ and show them to me. Where I have trusted a person more than I have trusted You, forgive me and settle my faith on the only foundation that cannot fail. I want to know You, the power of Your resurrection and the fellowship of Your sufferings. You are my Lord. Amen.
Truth received brings freedom. Truth believed establishes the heart.
Scripture quotations are from the King James Version. · Illustrations using first names only are composites unless stated otherwise.