Ifechukwu came to Lagos at seventeen with one bag and an admission letter he could not afford to use. The uncle he was meant to stay with had lost his shop in a fire at the market two weeks before he arrived. For a month he slept on the uncle’s sitting-room floor in Ojota and attended a small church at the end of the street, mostly because it was somewhere to be on Sunday.
The pastor noticed him. He asked a few questions after service, then a few more. A week later he paid Ifechukwu’s acceptance fee at the polytechnic. When the uncle’s household could no longer feed another mouth, the pastor let him sleep in the small room behind the church office for six months, and his wife sent food across every evening. “Under God,” Ifechukwu would say for years afterwards, “I owe that man my life.” He meant it. When his first son was born, he gave the boy the pastor’s name as a middle name.
By the time he was in his thirties, Ifechukwu was a chartered accountant and the volunteer secretary of the church’s finance committee. The church had grown into a large congregation with a building project, and he was proud to serve the man who had once served him.
Then, one Tuesday evening, the pastor called him into the office and slid a document across the desk. It authorised the transfer of most of the building fund into the account of a company that, Ifechukwu knew, belonged to the pastor’s wife. “It is for the land purchase,” the pastor said. “The agent wants it moved quickly. The board does not need to sit for this. Just sign.”
The previous Sunday the pastor had preached on Psalm 105, and one line from the sermon came back to Ifechukwu as he looked at the paper: “A child of God does not question the anointing. The Bible says, Touch not mine anointed.”
He did not sign. He went home and sat in his car outside his house for a long time. After everything he did for me, he thought. Who am I to refuse him?
That question deserves an answer, and many faithful believers are asking it in some form. Does gratitude to a leader mean I must accept whatever he says and does? Can I honour a man and still refuse him?
Honour is a Christian duty
Let us begin where Scripture begins. Christians are called to honour those who lead them, and that call is warm, not grudging:
And we beseech you, brethren, to know them which labour among you, and are over you in the Lord, and admonish you; And to esteem them very highly in love for their work’s sake. And be at peace among yourselves.
Look at the three descriptions of these leaders. They “labour among you,” working hard. They “are over you in the Lord,” exercising real responsibility under Christ. And they “admonish you,” warning and correcting. The Thessalonians are to “know” them, to recognise and appreciate them, and to “esteem them very highly in love.”
Notice the reason Paul gives: “for their work’s sake.” The honour is attached to the labour. It is not grounded in charisma, celebrity, family connections or the size of the ministry. It rests on the faithful work of caring for God’s people. And it is joined to a further instruction: “And be at peace among yourselves.” Honour for leaders and peace in the congregation belong together.
Paul says something similar to Timothy: “Let the elders that rule well be counted worthy of double honour, especially they who labour in the word and doctrine” (1 Timothy 5:17). The next verse makes clear that this includes fair financial support: “The labourer is worthy of his reward” (1 Timothy 5:18). Churches that underpay their pastors while expecting their families to live on air are not honouring them.
Honour has many practical forms. Praying for your leaders by name. Paying them fairly. Refusing to join gossip about them. Cooperating with reasonable decisions even when you would have chosen differently. Thanking them. Defending them against slander. Giving them the benefit of the doubt in matters of judgement. Ifechukwu had done all of these for years, and rightly so. His gratitude was not a mistake. It was a godly response to real kindness.
The question is what honour includes, and where it ends.
When honour turns into idolatry
There is a kind of regard for leaders that has crossed a line. It is hard to define precisely, but its signs are recognisable. The leader’s words are treated as though they carried the authority of Scripture. Followers find it impossible to imagine that he could be wrong. Every criticism, however careful, is answered with anger. His titles grow longer each year. His photograph appears more prominently than the cross. People give to him in the hope of obtaining a blessing that only God can give. And sometimes, quietly, the phrase “my father in the Lord” begins to crowd out the Father in heaven.
The church in Corinth had this problem. Its members had attached themselves to favourite leaders, and they were boasting about them. Paul’s response was sharp: “Is Christ divided? was Paul crucified for you? or were ye baptized in the name of Paul?” (1 Corinthians 1:13). Then he turned the whole arrangement upside down:
Therefore let no man glory in men. For all things are yours; Whether Paul, or Apollos, or Cephas, or the world, or life, or death, or things present, or things to come; all are yours; And ye are Christ’s; and Christ is God’s.
“Let no man glory in men.” Then the astonishing reversal: “all things are yours; Whether Paul, or Apollos, or Cephas.” The Corinthians thought they belonged to their leaders. Paul says the leaders belong to them. Paul, Apollos and Peter were gifts given by God to the church for its good. And the church, in turn, belongs to Christ: “And ye are Christ’s; and Christ is God’s.” The chain of belonging never ends in a human being.
A chapter later Paul explains why he has been using himself and Apollos as examples: “that ye might learn in us not to think of men above that which is written” (1 Corinthians 4:6). That is a useful boundary. Think highly of faithful leaders, but never above what is written. When a leader’s word is placed above Scripture, honour has become idolatry.
The prophet Jeremiah put the danger more starkly: “Cursed be the man that trusteth in man, and maketh flesh his arm, and whose heart departeth from the LORD” (Jeremiah 17:5). The problem is not respect for people. It is the transfer of the heart’s ultimate trust from God to a human being.
Servants who refused to be worshipped
One of the clearest tests of a leader is what he does when people try to give him more honour than he should receive. In Lystra, Paul healed a man who had been lame from birth, and the crowd drew a conclusion:
And when the people saw what Paul had done, they lifted up their voices, saying in the speech of Lycaonia, The gods are come down to us in the likeness of men. And they called Barnabas, Jupiter; and Paul, Mercurius, because he was the chief speaker. Then the priest of Jupiter, which was before their city, brought oxen and garlands unto the gates, and would have done sacrifice with the people. Which when the apostles, Barnabas and Paul, heard of , they rent their clothes, and ran in among the people, crying out, And saying, Sirs, why do ye these things? We also are men of like passions with you, and preach unto you that ye should turn from these vanities unto the living God, which made heaven, and earth, and the sea, and all things that are therein.
Paul and Barnabas tore their clothes, the traditional sign of horror at blasphemy, and ran into the crowd shouting. “We also are men of like passions with you.” They did not quietly enjoy the admiration and then deflect it modestly afterwards. They were appalled, and they used the moment to point the people away from themselves “unto the living God.”
Peter did the same when Cornelius fell at his feet: “Stand up; I myself also am a man” (Acts 10:26). Even an angel refused John’s worship in the book of Revelation, saying, “See thou do it not: for I am thy fellowservant” (Revelation 22:9).
Contrast that with King Herod, who sat on his throne in royal robes, made a speech, and allowed the crowd to shout, “It is the voice of a god, and not of a man” (Acts 12:22). He accepted it. “And immediately the angel of the Lord smote him, because he gave not God the glory” (Acts 12:23).
Faithful servants of God are uncomfortable with excessive honour. They redirect it. If a leader encourages people to treat him as more than a man, that is itself a warning sign, however anointed his preaching may be.
Imitating leaders as they follow Christ
The letter to the Hebrews gives a fuller picture of what it means to honour leaders well: “Remember them which have the rule over you, who have spoken unto you the word of God: whose faith follow, considering the end of their conversation” (Hebrews 13:7).
There are three movements in that verse. Remember them. Do not forget those who first brought you the word of God. Gratitude has a memory. Whose faith follow. The thing we are to imitate is their faith, their trust in God and their obedience to Him. We are not told to copy their mannerisms, adopt their opinions on every subject or attach ourselves to their personalities. And then, considering the end of their conversation. In the King James English, conversation means the whole manner of life. The writer tells believers to look at how their leaders have lived, and how their lives have turned out, and to let that shape their imitation. Honour in this verse is not blind. It looks carefully at conduct.
Paul says something similar about himself: “Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ” (1 Corinthians 11:1). That little phrase, even as, sets the boundary. Follow Paul in so far as Paul is following Christ. Where a leader’s path departs from the path of Christ, the call to imitate him stops at that point.
This matters especially in cultures like ours, where respect for elders and those in authority runs deep. That respect is a beautiful thing, and the gospel does not ask us to lose it. A young Nigerian believer who greets his pastor with warmth and courtesy is doing well. But cultural respect can quietly become a reason never to question an older or more senior person, even when something is clearly wrong. The gospel keeps the courtesy and removes the immunity. We bow our heads to God alone. To our leaders we give respect, gratitude and support, with our eyes open to how they live.
PunchlineHonour a faithful leader gladly, but never above what is written. Gratitude for what a man has done does not make every claim he makes true.
The noble habit of checking
When Paul and Silas preached in Berea, Luke records the people’s response with obvious approval:
These were more noble than those in Thessalonica, in that they received the word with all readiness of mind, and searched the scriptures daily, whether those things were so.
Remember who was preaching. This was the apostle Paul, a man who had seen the risen Christ and who would write a large part of the New Testament. The Bereans did not dismiss him. They “received the word with all readiness of mind.” They were open, eager and teachable. But they also “searched the scriptures daily, whether those things were so.” They checked even Paul against the Scriptures, and Luke calls them “more noble” for it.
That combination is exactly what healthy honour looks like. Readiness and examination together. A church that only examines becomes cynical and proud, always suspicious of its leaders. A church that only receives becomes gullible, ready to follow whatever is said with enough confidence. The Bereans held both, and as a result “many of them believed” (Acts 17:12).
Paul gave the same instruction to the Thessalonians, a few verses after telling them to esteem their leaders highly: “Prove all things; hold fast that which is good” (1 Thessalonians 5:21). John wrote, “believe not every spirit, but try the spirits whether they are of God” (1 John 4:1). Discernment is not disloyalty. It is a command.
Gratitude can cloud this. When a leader has blessed us deeply, it is hard to imagine him being wrong, and harder still to say so. But gratitude answers the question “What has this person done for me?” It does not answer the question “Is this thing he is saying true?” Ifechukwu’s pastor had been right about a great many things. That did not make him right about the building fund.
Even apostles needed correction. When Peter withdrew from eating with Gentile believers in Antioch, under pressure from visitors, Paul says, “I withstood him to the face, because he was to be blamed” (Galatians 2:11). Peter was a pillar of the church. He had walked with Jesus. And he was wrong on that occasion, in a way that threatened the truth of the gospel. Paul honoured Peter enough to tell him the truth.
“Touch not mine anointed” in its setting
Few verses are misused as often in this discussion as the one Ifechukwu’s pastor had quoted. Let us read it in context:
When they were but a few men in number; yea, very few, and strangers in it. When they went from one nation to another, from one kingdom to another people; He suffered no man to do them wrong: yea, he reproved kings for their sakes; Saying , Touch not mine anointed, and do my prophets no harm.
The psalm is retelling Israel’s history. “When they were but a few men in number” refers to the patriarchs, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, wandering as strangers in Canaan and travelling “from one nation to another.” In those days they were vulnerable. Yet God “suffered no man to do them wrong: yea, he reproved kings for their sakes.” We know some of those kings. God plagued Pharaoh “because of Sarai Abram’s wife” (Genesis 12:17), and warned Abimelech, king of Gerar, in a dream (Genesis 20:3). Abraham is even called a prophet in that chapter (Genesis 20:7).
So who are the “anointed” here? The patriarchs, whom God had chosen and set apart. And what does “touch” mean? To harm them. The verse describes God protecting a small, defenceless family from powerful kings who could have destroyed them.
Notice what that means for how the verse is often used today. In the psalm, the anointed are the vulnerable and the ones being warned are the powerful. When the verse is turned into a shield to protect a powerful leader from the questions of ordinary members, it has been turned upside down. And the verse says nothing at all about questioning someone’s teaching or asking for an account of money.
David’s refusal to kill Saul is sometimes used in the same way. But David’s words were about violence: “who can stretch forth his hand against the LORD’S anointed, and be guiltless?” (1 Samuel 26:9). In the same chapter David openly challenged Saul’s conduct: “what have I done? or what evil is in mine hand?” (1 Samuel 26:18). Refusing to harm a leader is entirely compatible with telling him the truth. And when David himself, the Lord’s anointed king, committed adultery and arranged a murder, God sent the prophet Nathan to say to his face, “Thou art the man. Thus saith the LORD God of Israel, I anointed thee king over Israel” (2 Samuel 12:7). God named David’s anointing in the very sentence that rebuked him.
NuggetThe anointing is never a reason to stop asking whether a leader is walking in the truth. It is the reason the question matters so much.
Accountability takes the office seriously
Paul gave Timothy clear instructions for handling accusations against elders:
Against an elder receive not an accusation, but before two or three witnesses. Them that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear. I charge thee before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, and the elect angels, that thou observe these things without preferring one before another, doing nothing by partiality.
Two things are held together here. First, protection: “Against an elder receive not an accusation, but before two or three witnesses.” Leaders are exposed to criticism, rumour and malice, and they should not be destroyed by a single unsupported complaint. That is a real form of honour. Gossip and online campaigns against leaders, built on hearsay, have no place in the church.
Second, accountability: “Them that sin rebuke before all, that others also may fear.” When an elder is shown to have sinned, the matter is not to be buried for the sake of his reputation or the ministry’s image. And Paul adds a solemn charge “before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, and the elect angels,” that Timothy should act “without preferring one before another, doing nothing by partiality.” The popular preacher and the unknown member stand under the same standard.
This is how Scripture takes spiritual office seriously. The higher the responsibility, the higher the accountability. “My brethren, be not many masters, knowing that we shall receive the greater condemnation” (James 3:1). Jesus said, “unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required” (Luke 12:48). A church that refuses to hold its leaders accountable has not honoured the office. It has made the office cheap, as though a pastor’s conduct did not really matter.
Accountability also protects leaders from themselves. Every leader is a human being with blind spots, pressures and temptations. Clear financial controls, independent boards, audited accounts and a safe way for members to raise concerns are not insults to a godly pastor. They are a gift to him, and to the people he serves.
Honour that tells the truth
How, then, do you honour a leader while refusing to idolise him? Here are some practical ways.
Examine your own heart first. Before you raise a concern, ask honestly what is driving you. Is it love for the truth and for the church, or is it resentment over a position you were not given, irritation at a personality, or the pleasure of being the one who knows? Jesus told us to “first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly” (Matthew 7:5). That does not mean you must be perfect before you may speak. It means you should speak as someone who also needs grace. Paul’s instruction for restoring a brother overtaken in a fault applies to leaders as much as anyone: “restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted” (Galatians 6:1).
Keep your gratitude, and keep your conscience. You can say, “This man has blessed me greatly,” and also, “He is wrong about this.” Both can be true at once.
Distinguish between kinds of concern. A difference of preference about music or programmes is very different from a doctrinal error, and both are different from misconduct. Most preferences are best left alone or raised gently. Doctrinal concerns should be raised with an open Bible. Misconduct needs a proper process.
Go privately first for ordinary matters, with humility and the facts. Speak as one who wants the leader to succeed.
Use proper channels for serious matters. If the concern involves money, abuse of power or moral failure, take it to the board, the elders or the wider oversight body. Bring documents where you can. Do not carry it to social media, and do not recruit a faction.
Report crimes to the authorities. Sexual abuse, assault and fraud are not internal church matters only. Where a child or vulnerable adult is at risk, act immediately and report to the police or the relevant agencies. No appeal to honour or anointing can justify silence about abuse.
Refuse financial pressure. Giving in the New Testament is free: “not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loveth a cheerful giver” (2 Corinthians 9:7). Honouring a pastor never requires you to fund a lifestyle through fear, to hand over your payslip, or to sow money you need for your family’s food and rent in exchange for a promised blessing.
PunchlineKeep praying for the leader, even when you have had to oppose him. Honour that tells the truth still wants his good.
And leaders, make this easier. Welcome questions publicly. Open your accounts. Accept independent oversight. When you are wrong, say so. Your people will trust you more, not less.
Ifechukwu went back to the pastor’s office two days later. He took the unsigned document with him, and his hands were shaking. He told the pastor, with as much respect as he could gather, that he could not sign a transfer of the building fund to a family company without the board’s approval, and that if it had to go to the board he would have to tell them what had been proposed.
The pastor’s face hardened. “After everything I did for you,” he said. “This is how you repay me?”
“Sir,” Ifechukwu said, “this is how I repay you.”
He took the matter to the chairman of the board, with copies of the document and the bank details. The board met that weekend. The land agent, it turned out, had been pressing the pastor hard, and the pastor had convinced himself that moving the money quietly was the only way to secure the plot. The board stopped the transfer. They commissioned an independent valuation of the land, which came back at less than half the agent’s price.
For three weeks the pastor did not speak to Ifechukwu. Then, one evening, he knocked on the door of his flat. He sat in the sitting room and drank the tea Ifechukwu’s wife made him, and after a long silence he said, “You honoured me more by refusing than you would have done by signing.” A month later he stood before the congregation, told them in general terms that he had made a serious error of judgement in handling church funds, and announced a new finance policy with independent signatories. He also said that he had preached Psalm 105 wrongly, and he read it again in its context.
Ifechukwu still calls him his father in the Lord. His son still carries his name. But he will tell you that something changed in his understanding of honour that week. “I used to think honouring him meant never letting him down,” he said. “Now I think it means never letting him fall without trying to catch him.”
That is the honour Scripture asks of us. Esteem faithful leaders very highly in love, for their work’s sake. Pray for them, support them and thank them. And love them enough to tell them the truth, because they, like us, belong to Christ, and Christ is God’s.
Teaching Companion
For Reflection
- Who are the leaders God has used to bless you? In what practical ways could you honour them this month?
- Have you ever found it hard to question something a leader said because you were grateful to him? How did you handle it?
- How does Psalm 105:12-15, read in context, change the way you understand “Touch not mine anointed”?
- What would it look like for your church to practise the balance of 1 Timothy 5:19-21, protecting leaders from slander while holding them accountable?
- Where are you tempted to think of a man “above that which is written”?
This Week
Choose one leader who has blessed you and honour him or her this week in a specific, practical way: a letter of thanks naming what their ministry has meant to you, a gift, or a commitment to pray for them daily. Then choose one teaching you have accepted from a respected leader and do what the Bereans did. Search the Scriptures for yourself to see whether it is so, and write down what you find.
A Prayer
Father, thank You for the faithful leaders You have given me, those who have laboured among me, cared for my soul and taught me Your word. Help me to esteem them very highly in love, to pray for them, support them and speak well of them. Guard my heart from placing any man above what is written, or from trusting in flesh instead of in You. Give me the noble readiness of the Bereans, eager to receive and careful to examine. When truth must be spoken, give me courage and humility to speak it in love. Protect Your church from leaders who misuse Your name, and protect faithful leaders from slander. I belong to Christ, and Christ is Yours. Amen.
Truth received brings freedom. Truth believed establishes the heart.
Scripture quotations are from the King James Version. · Illustrations using first names only are composites unless stated otherwise.